Truly Dumb Things Women Got Asked On First Dates

Jordan Claes
Two women laughing outside. One is wearing a floppy hat and the other has on a jean jacket with a black choker necklace.
Unsplash | Priscilla Du Preez

I don't like to paint with broad strokes and I try to avoid stereotypes whenever possible. That said, we as men tend to ask women some incredibly dumb questions from time to time. Trust me, I speak from experience.

Sometimes it comes from being nervous, other times they're derived from pure ignorance. So have a look below and check out these ridiculously dumb things that these women of Reddit were asked on a first date.

What's your body count?

A sniper in a full ghillie suit, hiding in the woods.
Unsplash | Kony

Reddit user Sand_Dargon was asked whether or not she'd ever killed somebody on a first date. She further clarified that she's a member of the Armed Forces, but still — you just don't ask someone that question.

Why are you being so nice?

A couple out for a date, sitting at a table on a patio, drinking coffee.
Unsplash | Wiktor Karkocha

While out for dinner, Redditor Missyls6 made the "mistake" of being polite to the waitress waiting on hers and her date's table. He sarcastically turned and asked her if she planned on continuing to be nice to everyone for the rest of the evening.

Would you ever get rid of your children?

Two young sisters reading a book in a field as the sun is going down.
Unsplash | Ben White

"Had a guy ask me if I was really attached to my children. When I didn’t answer and just made a questioning face, he went on to explain that he doesn’t date women with kids (single mom was clearly stated on my profile) so he was hoping I’d say no and…just get rid of them I guess?!" - Reddit u/ATVig

"My place or yours?"

A woman on a first date, making a cringe face and nodding her head.
Giphy | Originals

A first date is a lot like a job interview. Meaning, you have to ask a lot of questions to show your interest and warrant a callback. But if all you can muster is "My place or yours?" then you should expect to have a door slammed in your face.

How do you "do it"?

A woman cocking her eyebrows and offering a crooked smile in confusion.
Unsplash | OSPAN ALI

Reddit user coellan is an amputee, having lost the part of her leg below the knee. She says that the most common question she gets asked, on a first date or otherwise, is "How do you have sex?"

"Are you ticklish?"

Chris Farley wearing a life jacket in 'Tommy Boy', saying "Man, do I sound like an idiot."

Before the opening credits started to roll at the movie theater, Redditor kittyt0es's date asked if she was ticklish. She replied that she wasn't and didn't like being touched, so he proceeded to try and tickle her for the duration of the movie.

"I complimented the waitress' eyeshadow. He says, 'Are you trying to set up a 3 way[sic]?'" - Reddit u/SparklyLobster

A young woman with her hair done up, standing on the road beside the woods, laughing in the rain.
Unsplash | Jamie Brown

Five fingers make a fist.

Ron Swanson and Tom Haverford in 'Community'.  Ron is saying "He looks like he could use a swift punch in the face."

During a stroll through the park, Reddit user willow0281 was asked, rather bluntly, if she was into fisting. Her date doubled down by saying that if she was not, then this wasn't going to work.

Gnarly, dude!

A plume of smoke coming off a joint.
Unsplash | Stephen Hocking

Redditor therandom83 explained to her date how she has a university degree in biology. His response was "Wow! So, like, what was your major?" She feels confident that he must've smoked a lot of weed before their date.

Murder talk is not the same as pillow talk.

Vicky holding up a sign in 'Water Boy' that says "Want me to kill them?"

Reddit user starwaps date decided that he wanted to take her on a hike through the woods. When they'd nearly reached the top, he turned to her and said "What if I would’ve brought you all the way out here to murder you?"

Best to save all period-related questions until the third date.

Nine tampons out of the wrapper, placed beside one another alternating up/down.
Unsplash | Natracare

"Once a guy didn’t ask me a single question for two hours, so I decided to point that out. He got annoyed, sighed, then said ‘How heavy is your flow?’" - Reddit u/glasstambourine

Rape jokes are never funny.

Amber Rose saying, "When I say 'no,' it means no."

Reddit user Which_Apartment6250 thought she'd met a nice guy at a church program. While the two of them were walking home after service, he turned to her and said, "You know, I could rape you right now." He laughed, as if it was funny, and she ran the rest of the way home.

Who orders shrimp soup for someone without asking?

A large bowl of shrimp soup.

Reddit user makpat arrived ten minutes early to dinner and discovered her date was already there and had ordered for her. He became incensed and asked why she wouldn't eat the soup he'd ordered for her. She explained that it was because it was shrimp soup — and that she was allergic.

Have you ever had any run-ins with the law?

The lineup scene in 'The Usual Suspects'.
Giphy | FilmStruck

Reddit user LateNightCheesecake9 got roped into paying for tickets to a sporting event, as well as all the food and drinks while they were there. After being kind enough to drive her date home, he turned to ask her if she'd ever been arrested. Then, he showed her his mugshot.

"'Are you fine with [expletive] in my mouth?' No, sir. I am not. And this date is over." - Reddit u/AevumFlux

A wooden doll, seated on the edge of a toilet seat.
Unsplash | Giorgio Trovato

That may just be the crappiest first date story I've ever heard! Word to the wise, fellas, you may want to keep your sexual preferences quiet until you actually enter into a relationship with someone.

Conspiracy theories make strange bed fellows.

Charlie Kelly in 'It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia' making a conspiracy web with red string and paper.

After a few enjoyable dates, the guy that Reddit user GiftRecent was seeing began sending her unsolicited links claiming that the war between Ukraine and Russia was a hoax. He was genuinely perplexed when she chose to end things.

What time do you go to bed?

A gamer playing X Box on a super wide TV.
Unsplash | Sam Pak

It seems like a harmless enough question, right? That's what Redditor Unkownuser35 thought when she was asked the same thing by her date. He then explained how he only dated girls with late bedtimes so that they could prepare/feed him snacks while he gamed late at night.

Do you want a second date?

Tom Delonge wearing a blonde wig and mustache in Blink-182's music video for "First Date."

Reddit user Suspicious-Party-950's date asked to see her again and then informed her that he was still in a relationship. He explained how he was considering leaving his current girlfriend, so long as their date went well.

"'How long have you been Asian for?' Um[sic] whole [expletive] life???" - Reddit u/MidnightFireHuntress

A woman wearing a white blouse, looking off to the side with her elbow resting on her crossed legs.
Unsplash | Pj Go

For my entire life, I always believed that the only "stupid questions" were the ones a person didn't ask. Now, I think I may need to rethink that philosophy.

How tall are you and how much do you weigh?

A woman standing on a bathroom scale.
Unsplash | i yunmai

As if that wasn't bad enough, Reddit user witch_hekate92 explained that after her date asked this incredibly rude question, he then prompted her to do the same thing to him. Why you trying to flex, bud?

Wait, why do you have a boner right now?

Michael Scott sitting with Phyllis Vance in 'The Office', saying "The only thing I'm worried about is getting a boner."

"After a pretty much normal date, we were in his car in front of my house when he gestured to his boner and said, 'well?' And I just laughed and got out of the car. He didn’t even get a goodbye kiss." - Reddit u/punctuationist

h/t: Reddit